Where every click is a journey and every impression counts.
The psychological phenomenon where people do things because other people are doing them, weaponized by marketers since the dawn of the testimonial. It's why every landing page has a section that says "Trusted by 10,000+ companies" next to logos you've never seen.
The corporate rebranding of "making stuff up to sell things," now elevated to an art form at marketing conferences worldwide. Every brand now has a story, even if that story is just "we sell soap" wrapped in 3,000 words of emotional manipulation.
The practice of dividing your audience into groups based on shared characteristics so you can send them slightly different versions of the same spam. It makes marketers feel like scientists even though most segments end up being "people who bought stuff" and "people who didn't."
Search Engine Optimization, the dark art of convincing Google your website deserves to be on page one. It involves a mixture of keyword stuffing, backlink begging, and praying that Google's latest algorithm update doesn't send your traffic back to the Stone Age.
Small promotional signs attached to retail shelves at product level, literally talking to shoppers at the point of decision. The impulse-buy whisperer of retail marketing.
An aggressive discounting pattern where prices progressively decrease to move inventory, crushing margin like asphalt under heavy machinery. The retail death spiral in action.
Search Engine Results Page, the digital battlefield where websites fight for the top position like gladiators in a colosseum run by Google. The first page is prime real estate, and the second page is where websites go to die in obscurity.
A fancy word for 'slice' that marketers use to sound more professional when dividing customers into groups. Whether it's a pie chart section, a customer demographic, or a portion of your total addressable market, segments make everything feel quantifiable and strategic. It's basically the business world's way of saying 'let's break this down.'
A prospect who's been vetted by marketing, kicked over to sales, and deemed worthy of actual human attention rather than automated email sequences. Abbreviated as SQL, which confusingly has nothing to do with databases.
Paid advertising on search engines, primarily Google, where you bid on keywords to appear when people search for things. It's the practice of paying to skip the line in search results, assuming you can outbid your competitors.
Using natural language processing to determine whether customer feedback, social mentions, or reviews express positive, negative, or neutral opinions about your brand. It's teaching computers to detect sarcasm, which goes about as well as you'd expect.
The art of slicing your audience into neat little boxes so you can target them with laser precision. Marketers love this term because it makes dividing people into demographics sound scientific rather than slightly creepy. Think of it as organizing humans like a well-arranged charcuterie board.
To weaken resistance, morale, or harsh edges—the corporate equivalent of turning down an opponent's defenses before asking them to sign the contract.
A physical advertising placard used to display products or promotions in retail environments, back when 'going viral' meant your display was visible from multiple aisles. The analog ancestor of today's digital signage, typically featuring aggressive fonts and starburst shapes screaming about sales. Still surprisingly effective at catching the attention of customers who've developed immunity to banner ads.
A video advertisement that graciously allows viewers to escape after five seconds, forcing advertisers to frontload value or face mass abandonment. Democracy in action, if democracy involved selling you soap.
A person secretly paid to hype up a product while cosplaying as an unbiased enthusiast, essentially the original influencer before Instagram made it a legitimate career. They're the planted audience member at an auction driving up bids, or that 'random customer' in the infomercial who just can't believe how amazing this vegetable chopper is. The word itself has become the ultimate callout in online discourse for anyone suspected of suspiciously enthusiastic endorsement.
Delivering ads in a specific order to tell a story or build a narrative over time. Because apparently one interruption isn't enough—you need a whole series.
Bite-sized marketing content designed for rapid consumption during micro-moments, because modern attention spans measure in seconds. The content equivalent of gas station jerky.
The consistency of message and design between an ad and its landing page, helping users confirm they're in the right place. Break this trail and watch conversion rates plummet like Hansel without breadcrumbs.
Someone else's first-party data that they share with you directly, like a data partnership minus the sketchy middleman. The often-overlooked middle child between first and third-party data.
Monitoring social media channels for mentions, conversations, and trends related to your brand, competitors, or industry. It's definitely not eavesdropping when it's for business purposes—it's 'market intelligence.'
Your brand's percentage of the total conversation or advertising in your category compared to competitors. Basically measuring who's yelling the loudest in a crowded room.
A delightfully meaningless marketing buzzword invented by the snowmobile industry to make their products sound cutting-edge and innovative. It's what happens when corporate types need to describe how well a snowmobile snowmobiles but can't just say "it works good." The vehicular equivalent of saying a phone has great "phonability."
In marketing, the person responsible for crafting narratives that make products sound like epic journeys rather than simple transactions. Modern marketers have elevated this to an art form, transforming soap into a 'personal wellness experience' and coffee into a 'morning ritual.' Also applies to game masters in tabletop RPGs and, let's be honest, anyone who's ever exaggerated on a resume.