Disrupting disruption with disruptive disruptions since 2010.
A technology or business model that destroys existing markets while making founders rich. Wall Street's favorite euphemism for 'we're breaking laws but we'll settle later.'
One company buying another, either for its technology and users or just to hire its talented team members—sometimes it's hard to tell which.
A pharmaceutical or medical device startup valued at $1B+ despite not yet proving its technology works or generating revenue. Faith-based valuation meets venture capital.
The special shares VCs get that have extra rights and protections—the VIP section of the cap table.
Optimizing your funding round structure to maximize returns on investor capital through preferred stock terms. It's when the finance side of VCs gets really, really aggressive.
That one customer a startup obsesses over landing, usually a Fortune 500 company that would validate everything and solve cash flow problems forever.
The special circle of Dante's Inferno where VCs ask increasingly absurd questions about your financial projections, customer concentration, and why your revenue is so lumpy.
A legally separate entity created to hold investments or structure deals, often used to bundle small investors into a single shareholder to simplify cap tables.
Lifetime Value divided by Customer Acquisition Cost, measuring whether a customer is profitable over their lifetime. If it's under 3:1, you're losing money on every sale.
A valuation method that multiplies annual revenue by an industry-standard multiple (e.g., 5x revenue) to estimate company value. It's less scientific than it sounds, mostly vibes-based.
The phenomenon where association with prestigious VCs or successful investors increases a startup's perceived credibility and ability to raise follow-on funding.
Employee Stock Ownership Plan—where startups promise employees equity that will be worthless if the company doesn't exit, incentivizing everyone to work for free in the hopes of distant riches.
Business-to-consumer sales model where your customer is an individual who will never read your terms of service and might churn after one bad experience.
A growing trend of founders rejecting venture capital in favor of bootstrapping, arguing that VC funding is more constraint than catalyst.
A product so bare-bones it barely qualifies as a product, but you call it an 'MVP' to sound legitimate. Usually features a landing page and nothing else.
When a supposedly legitimate startup fails vetting and is exposed as either fraudulent or fundamentally broken, usually discovered after the wire transfer clears.
Companies created in cohorts through accelerator programs like Y Combinator, characterized by shared learning and networking within their cohort group.
The earliest stage of venture funding, where investors give a startup money based primarily on the founding team and a vague idea of what success might look like. It's basically faith-based investing with spreadsheets.
Non-binding agreements where VCs outline investment terms before lawyers make them binding, during which everyone pretends the math makes sense.
The number of months required for a customer to generate enough profit to pay back their acquisition cost. If it's over 12 months, your unit economics are questionable.
The theoretical benefit of being the first company to launch a product in a market, which sounds great until the second, third, and fourth movers make better versions with bigger budgets. It's like being first to the buffet when everyone else is still getting in line.
Technology that claims to fundamentally change an industry, but often just means 'we have a different user interface and a VC believes in us.'
When a company acquires another company not for its product but for its talent, basically paying to dissolve a startup and recycle its employees.
Raising money primarily because everyone else is doing it and you're afraid of missing out, rather than because you actually need it. The startup equivalent of peer pressure at a middle school dance.