Disrupting disruption with disruptive disruptions since 2010.
A startup's dream scenario where it becomes a public company and founders finally get to sell their stock—statistically less likely than winning the lottery.
When a highly-valued startup implodes through mismanagement, fraud, or 'the market wasn't ready'—basically Elizabeth Holmes energy.
Sequential funding rounds labeled alphabetically, each supposedly representing the company's progression from barely-viable to 'we probably need more money anyway.'
A startup incubator or venture capital term for an early-stage company breeding ground where fledgling ideas get fed, nurtured, and hopefully don't die under fluorescent lights. Think of it as the preschool for businesses that haven't figured out profitability yet.
The price per share at which employees can exercise their stock options. Set artificially low so they can actually afford to buy their equity on the off chance it's worth something.
The messy dissolution of a relationship (romantic or business) where two things that were stuck together decide they'd rather never see each other again. Bonus awkwardness if they share a friend group.
Money from professional investors betting billions annually that 1% of startups will become unicorns. A mostly efficient system for transferring wealth from LPs to founders (and from founders to VCs).
Selling to other companies rather than consumers, typically involving longer sales cycles and higher contract values.
Venture Capitalist or Venture Capital—investors who bet on high-risk, high-reward startups in exchange for equity. They're basically professional optimists with other people's money.
Section 409A of the tax code that requires startup stock options to be valued at fair market value when granted; 101 refers to California corporate code. It's basically the IRS saying 'no, you can't just give away equity tax-free.'
The realistic revenue you can capture in the next 5-10 years—the number that makes your board members slightly less nervous than TAM.
How much money your subscription business expects to make monthly from existing customers. The metric that makes founders feel slightly less broke.
Selling directly to individual consumers, requiring massive scale and viral growth to be venture-viable.
A mechanism where existing users naturally bring in new users, creating exponential growth without paid advertising. It's the holy grail that almost nobody actually achieves.
Large organizations like pension funds, insurance companies, or endowments that invest in venture funds, adding legitimacy and money but no direct feedback.
To board a vessel or aircraft, or more metaphorically, to start something new and vaguely terrifying. Whether it's a cruise ship or a startup, embarking means you've committed and there's no backing out now.
Special shares that get priority in liquidation, dividends, or control—essentially investor insurance against founder incompetence.
The introduction of something new—a fresh idea, process, or product that differs from the status quo. The corporate world's favorite word to slap on anything that isn't from 1987.
Sequential rounds of venture funding with progressively larger checks and increasingly skeptical investors asking harder questions.
A market opportunity that nobody has thoroughly exploited yet, either because it's genuinely undiscovered or because nobody cares.
The engineering audit where technical experts examine your code, architecture, and tech debt to see if you're about to implode.
Cloud-based software customers pay for monthly/yearly as subscriptions instead of licensing, the dominant startup business model.
A wooden stick driven into the ground to mark territory or prop things up, or in the business world, the percentage ownership or financial commitment you have in a deal. High stakes mean high risk and high reward; low stakes mean you're testing the waters.
Being the first to boldly venture into uncharted territory—whether that's a new market, technology, or increasingly, a niche on TikTok. The marketing term for 'we did it before it was cool.'