Publish or perish in the ivory tower of learning outcomes.
"General education" requirements - the courses outside your major that supposedly create well-rounded graduates but mostly create resentment. Engineering majors taking art history, arts majors taking math, everyone unhappy.
A large carrion-eating bird of prey with a bald or sparsely feathered head, powerful hooked beak, and excellent soaring flight; also used metaphorically to describe a ruthless person who preys on the vulnerable or profiteers from others' misfortune.
A person, place, or utterance believed to provide wise counsel or prophetic predictions, historically a priest or priestess through whom gods were thought to speak; in modern usage, any authoritative or trusted source of information or wisdom.
A comprehensive test at the end of the semester that theoretically covers everything but practically ignores the first six weeks you all forgot.
A research accomplice or paid actor embedded in a psychological study who pretends to be a regular participant while actually manipulating the experiment. Basically, a professional liar with scientific credentials.
An intense, uninterrupted coding marathon in Java programming where sleep, food, and social interaction are sacrificed for the sake of meeting deadlines. College students' favorite form of self-imposed suffering.
The art of silently rebelling against a boring class by covertly gaming on your device while the teacher drones on, blissfully unaware of your digital escape. A rite of passage for students with WiFi access and zero chill.
An ingressive clicking sound made by coarticulating a velar or uvular closure—the noise that dolphins use to communicate and that linguists use to confuse everyone else. It's a sound, but make it linguistic.
Three or more notes played simultaneously to create harmony—the sonic foundation of most music that doesn't sound like a cat walking across a keyboard. In architecture, it's the straight line connecting two points on a curve (far less poetic).
Live instruction where everyone shows up at the same time, which brings back the convenience of forcing yourself awake for 8 AM lectures.
When attending a notoriously poor university tanks your self-esteem so hard that you forget the problem is the institution, not you—essentially, the university is gaslighting you into thinking you're the failure.
To crush or compress something into small folds and wrinkles, destroying its smooth or flat appearance; used both literally for physical objects and figuratively for abstract concepts like confidence or resolve. The term often implies a sudden collapse or deterioration.
The patterns of rhythm, stress, and intonation in spoken language or poetry; the musical qualities of language including meter, cadence, and tone. In linguistics, prosody encompasses all the suprasegmental features of speech beyond individual sounds.
The practice and profession of compiling, writing, and editing dictionaries, or the study of how words are structured and defined within language.
The scholarly study of music that transforms a beloved hobby into an academic discipline complete with dissertation requirements. Musicologists analyze what makes great music great, then write about it in language that makes music seem terrible.
The sweet spot between what you can do alone and what you can't do even with help—Vygotsky's fancy way of saying 'the learning zone.'
Thinking about thinking, or as teenagers would call it, 'overthinking everything'—actually useful in learning.
Reviewing material at increasing intervals to move it to long-term memory—the opposite of cramming and actually backed by neuroscience.
A mineral formation hanging from the ceiling of a cave, created by the gradual accumulation of mineral-rich water dripping from above. Stalactites grow downward over thousands of years and are typically composed of calcite or other minerals.
Student Learning Outcome—specific, measurable statements describing what students should know or be able to do after completing a course. They're primarily written to satisfy accreditors and rarely read by actual students.
A comprehensive children's encyclopedia series published since 1917, designed for classroom and home reference with illustrated articles accessible to young readers. One of the most widely distributed encyclopedias in American schools.
Florida State University's legendary main library, affectionately nicknamed for its 24-hour availability, built-in Starbucks, and reputation as a social hub—basically the academic equivalent of a nightclub but with better Wi-Fi.
A Scottish schoolroom term for a jotter or notebook; what your Fife teacher demanded you fetch during lesson time.
A coarse, striped fabric woven from goat or camel hair that's basically the original fast-fashion import from the Middle East—durable, unfussy, and perfect for anyone trying to look mysteriously nomadic. Also the sleeveless robe made from said fabric, because why button when you can just drape?