Where cozy means tiny and charming means needs work.
A transaction that has collapsed spectacularly, usually after everyone involved has invested weeks of time, hope, and paperwork. The real estate equivalent of a relationship that was 'totally going somewhere' until it wasn't.
The public countdown timer that silently shames a property for not selling fast enough. After 30 days, neighbors start whispering. After 90, the house might as well have a scarlet letter on the lawn sign.
Short for capitalization rate, it's a number that tells investors whether a property will make money or just slowly drain their soul and savings. The higher the cap rate, the better the return, unless you forgot to factor in literally anything else.
A nearby property that supposedly proves your house is worth what someone says it is, despite having completely different everything. It's the real estate version of comparing apples to slightly different apples that sold six months ago.
Short for For Sale By Owner, which is real estate speak for "I watched one YouTube video and now I don't need a professional." The savings on commission are usually offset by the cost of mistakes only a professional would have caught.
The amount of land your property sits on, which matters a lot until you realize most of it is a setback you can't build on anyway. It's the real estate equivalent of buying a large popcorn that's mostly air.
A large, final payment due at the end of a loan term that covers the remaining principal balance. Named for its tendency to inflate your anxiety levels right before it's due.
When a property seller provides financing to the buyer, essentially acting as the bank and holding a note secured by the property. It's the real estate version of 'I'll spot you until payday'—except with six-figure stakes and actual paperwork.
The legal fine print that tells you what you can't do with your property, crushing dreams of backyard chicken coops and neon pink houses since time immemorial. These are the rules embedded in deeds, HOA bylaws, or zoning laws that limit how you can use or modify property. They're the reason you need to ask permission to build that treehouse in your own yard.
The guaranteed timeframe during which your mortgage interest rate won't change, typically 30-60 days. It's a race between closing and your lock expiring, with your financial future hanging in the balance.
A mortgage provision requiring full loan repayment if the property is sold or transferred, effectively preventing you from passing your sweet 3% interest rate to the next owner. Also known as a 'due-on-sale clause' for those who prefer their contract language less sci-fi sounding.
A property for sale that's kept secret from the general public, like a speakeasy for houses. Only the agent's inner circle gets to know about it, which is definitely not exclusionary at all.
A sale term indicating the property is being sold in its current state with no repairs, warranties, or guarantees from the seller. Translation: buyer beware, because that mysterious smell and creaky foundation are now your problems.
A tax levied by state or local government when property ownership changes hands. It's the government's cut of your real estate transaction, because apparently they weren't getting enough already.
A fancier way of saying "price" that makes real estate agents feel like they're doing economics instead of sales. It adds absolutely nothing to the conversation except an extra word and a sense of sophistication.
When the property seller acts as the bank because either the buyer can't get a traditional loan or the seller wants to collect interest payments. It's basically a handshake agreement with paperwork, beloved by people who can't qualify for mortgages and sellers who enjoy playing banker.
The fancy legal term for transferring property ownership from one party to another, complete with all the paperwork that makes it official. It's both the act of moving title and the document that proves you now own that thing. Real estate's way of saying 'this is yours now' in the most formal way possible.
A house built by a developer on speculation without a specific buyer lined up. Building it and hoping they will come—the real estate field of dreams.
A soil test measuring how quickly water drains, crucial for determining if a property can support a septic system. Dirt's resume for its ability to handle your wastewater.
Days On Market—the number of calendar days a listing has been active, serving as a digital scarlet letter that either signals a property is priced wrong or has bodies buried in the backyard. The higher the number, the more desperate everyone becomes.
A transaction where the property owner sells to an investor then immediately leases it back, converting ownership to rental while extracting equity. Corporate real estate's way of having your cake, selling it, then renting it back to eat it anyway.
Short for 'subject to'—acquiring a property while leaving the existing mortgage in place and making payments on behalf of the seller. It's a creative financing technique that makes attorneys nervous and investors wealthy.
A property built on speculation without a specific buyer in mind, using builder-grade everything in beige or gray. The housing equivalent of business casual—safe, boring, and designed to offend absolutely nobody.
Prepaid interest paid at closing to reduce your mortgage rate, with each point costing 1% of the loan amount. The financial equivalent of paying now to save monthly forever, assuming you stay in the house long enough to break even.