Parachute

Definition

The financial package given to departing executives (usually millionaires) to 'land softly,' because apparently regular severance isn't generous enough when stock options are involved.

Example Usage

The CEO was forced out, but his golden parachute was worth $47 million, so he's definitely suffering.

Origin

Term popularized in the 1980s during hostile takeovers

Fun Fact

Golden parachutes are inversely proportional to a company's actual performance

Source: Executive Compensation Terminology

Related Terms

Advanced

Voluntary Attrition

When employees leave on their own, which companies celebrate because it's cheaper than layoffs. The "voluntary" part is debatable when the work environment is so intolerable that quitting is less a choice and more a survival instinct.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

internal mobility

The movement of employees between roles, departments, or locations within the same organization. Companies love promoting it as a benefit while simultaneously blocking transfers to keep you trapped in your current role.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

warm body

Any person hired to fill a position with minimal qualifications required—the staffing equivalent of 'good enough.' The bar is literally set at having a pulse and showing up.

👥 Human Resources

Beginner

selection

In HR-speak, the allegedly objective process of choosing the 'best' candidate from a pool of applicants, theoretically based on qualifications rather than golf handicaps. In evolutionary biology, it's nature's brutal but effective hiring process where the most fit survive. Both involve a lot of comparison, some unconscious bias, and outcomes that won't please everyone.

👥 Human Resources

Intermediate

disaffection

Corporate-speak for when employees have collectively stopped pretending to care, manifesting as decreased loyalty, subtle rebellion, and suspiciously high LinkedIn activity. It's the organizational equivalent of your teenager saying "fine" in that particular tone. Usually caused by poor leadership, broken promises, or one too many mandatory fun activities.

👥 Human Resources

Intermediate

At-Will Employment

A legal arrangement meaning your employer can fire you for any reason and you can quit for any reason, creating a beautiful symmetry of anxiety. In practice, it means your job security is a polite fiction maintained by mutual convenience.

👥 Human Resources

Translate This Term

See “Parachute” in Corporate Speak, Gen-Z Slang, Pirate Speak, and more.

Try the Translator

Share This Term

Post on X Share on Facebook Share on LinkedIn

Discover a Term

Advanced

kaiseki

A multi-course Japanese haute cuisine experience where tiny, meticulously arranged portions arrive in ceremonial success...